he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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