Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
i wish my penis had a tongue
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
