On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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