remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
