I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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