random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
