i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
