If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
