Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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