hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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