I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
i think i just lost a toe
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize