omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
