i'm signing you up for texting rehab
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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