I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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