yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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