Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
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