Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
