yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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