i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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