Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
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