why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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