The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
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