that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
