Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Randomize
