I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
