Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
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