what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize