Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
