if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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