i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize