the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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