She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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