just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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