And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
