$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Randomize