My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
