He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
