My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
