What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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