Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
