Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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