i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
