the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
