i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize