i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Randomize
