She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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