Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
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