For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize