I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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