There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
this boner is exhausting
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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