marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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